Did you ever notice that Harry Potter is an orphan? Aladdin too. Pippi Longstocking has no mother and her father is always traveling. Yes, almost every hero of a children’s book is an orphan. Why do the authors of these myths on which we were raised separate the child from his parents? Are they implying that a child cannot grow and blossom next to his mother and father?
Did you feel you were allowed to enjoy life in your parents’ home? That you were allowed to revel in who you were? That you could be what you wanted and express what you felt? If you didn’t feel protected and accepted in your parents’ home, the good news is that you’re not alone. The bad news is that many, many children feel alone when they are home with their father or mother.
We can change that.
Miraculous Parenting presents a new perspective on life with children. The book was written for parents who wish to feel excited about their parenting, who are ready to ask difficult questions about the fundamental principles of their parents and the culture in which we all were raised. The book is meant for people who choose to build a home for their children on completely new foundations: full acceptance, honestly, closeness and complete trust, no threats, no “instilling boundaries”, no punishment, no treating the people who are so dear to us as creatures who must be molded and taught what is good for them.
Every one of us has a damaged pattern of love that we learned and adopted from our parents, which we have let go, on some level, during our lives. Everyone has a deep knowledge, a simple connection, that exists within him—to the pattern of complete love, one that is not distorted, one that does not contain fear or control, one that he wishes with his whole being to give to his children.
It hurts to see that in most families, even after over a hundred and twenty years of Western psychology, parenting is a mundane series of motions at best, and a despairingly heavy task at worst. Deep introspection and willingness to see what is really happening there—between child and parent—allows parenting to become what it was meant to be: a wide opening through which love flows.
As parents, we can connect daily hardships with the requests that arise from deep within our children’s being—and ours. The hardships our children bring into our lives are meant to turn our attention inward, to who we really are. Behaviors, illnesses and habits that present difficulty to us and to our children are not a problem to be somehow solved so we can just go on with our lives.
These hardships are our children’s attempts to stop us, to awaken us, so we can look at ourselves, our choices and our motivating beliefs. To identify what old component of our identity no longer suits our new lives with our children. This perspective turns every hardship into an opportunity for growth.
Since “The Continuum Concept”, there has been no book that addresses the connection between the parents’ personal development as adults and their own parents. This need still exists. It even continues to grow, but there is virtually no response in literature.
This book was born out of “field-work”. For 18 years, the author facilitated thousands of personal consultations, courses and workshops in which he both learned and taught a new language, a forgotten language, that is so easy to learn, because it comes from within, from the free children that we were. Every hardship at home is an exciting opportunity to get closer to our children, an opportunity to strengthen the thread of love and trust that binds us, that gives both parents and children the sense of home without which it is very, very hard to breathe.
We are here
Between the old and the new.
Between our parents—and our children.
Between “there’s no choice” and the miracle of the freedom to choose.
Between the limitations we’ve collected and adopted
And the opportunities that are what we truly are.